i sit here with less than two weeks (11 days exactly) before i leave to head to texas.  as i start this new chapter of my life it got me thinking about life and what God has in store for myself as well as everyone around me.   i wish for every person reading this blog that they will grasp all that life has to offer, and that they will do so enjoying every minute.  i pray that in all you ddance as if no one is watchingo, you’ll be happy 🙂

…. so in the wise words from Lee Ann Womack: 

I hope you never lose your sense of wonder, You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger, May you never take one single breath for granted, GOD forbid love ever leave you empty handed, I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean, Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens, Promise me that you’ll give faith a fighting chance, And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.

I hope you dance….I hope you dance.

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance, Never settle for the path of least resistance Livin’ might mean takin’ chances, but they’re worth takin’, Lovin’ might be a mistake but it’s worth makin’, Don’t let some hell bent heart leave you bitter, When you come close to sellin’ out reconsider, Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance, And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.

I hope you dance….I hope you dance.

…. Tell me who wants to look back on their years and wonder where those years have gone….

grey’s anatomy

September 24, 2009

so…. i’ve been dying all summer waiting for season 6 to finally come.  TODAY IS THE DAY!!!! 🙂   i’ve been pouring through my Grey’s Anatomy season 5 DVDs for the past three days and tonight is the premiere of season 6.  so, for all you Grey’s Anatomy fanatics out there… enjoy five minutes of the first episode.

is it george or is it not???     its soooooooo good 🙂

today was long

September 23, 2009

so today i had an appointment with my army recruiters (turned into 5 hours) to figure out what’s going on since i haven’t heard from them nor have i received my orders.   with only having two weeks left before i leave for officer basic course, time seems to be flying fast.  i’m glad that i finally went to see them because it turns out that i have ALOT of paperwork and such left that needs to get done.  so here’s why i still dont have my orders.  apparently some idiot in washington doesn’ t have the word “TRANSCRIPT” in his vocabulary because he has been waiting for my school transcripts to be put into the army system… ding ding ding… they’ve been in there since aug 7, he just kept overlooking the word.   so now… after getting a runaround from washington today my army recruiters finally cleared that up and fingers crossed — orders will be in my email on thursday or friday!!!!  

so not only do i have two weeks to get paperwork done, i need to get a power of attorney, complete a will, pack all of my stuff (so that “transportation” can pick up all my stuff to ship while i’m gone), to getting uniforms.   so friday i’m heading to los alamitos army national guard base to get properly sized, buy at least one set of uniforms and then come home hoping that i can order two more sets and they’ll come in time for me to leave.     in addition to army stuff, i still need to go shopping for cold clothes since im a california kid who has “beach-wear”.   so until i leave…. ill be busy running around doing army errands     🙂

tuesdays with morrie

September 11, 2009

so today, while recuperating from nasal surgery, i decided to pick up and read a book i’ve been dying to get to. i have a stack of books that I have yet to pack because i want to read them before putting them away and so this morning i finished my last marianne williamson book and started tuesdays with morrie by mitch albom. this book i have to say is amazing. i could not put it down and was able to finish the book under 4 hours all the while grasping its life lessons. i’ve dealt alot the past 6 months with my life, what i want out of it, who i am, and who i am becoming. really, the past year i’ve learned who i am and have learned to love the skin and place i am at in life. i’m at peace with my life and the more i read the more i am encouraged about being on the right path for whatever God has planned for me… so here are a few quotes that i highlighted:

“the most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in.” (pg. 52)

“sometimes you cannot believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel. and if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too–even when you’re in the dark. even when your falling.” (pg. 61)

“to know you’re going to die, and to be prepared for it at any time. that’s better. that way you can actually be more involved in your life while you’re living.” (pg. 81)

“once you learn how to die, you learn how to live.” (pg. 82)

“you have to find what’s good and true and beautiful in your life as it is now.” (pg. 120)

“do the kinds of things that come from the heart. when you do, you won’t be dissatisfied, you won’t be envoius, you won’t be longing for somebody else’s things. on the contrary, you’ll be overwhelmed with what comes back.” (pg. 128)

“as long as we can love each other, and remember the feeling of love we had, we can die without ever really going away. all the love you created is still there. all the memories are still there. you live on–in the hearts of everyone you have touched and nurtured while you were here…. death ends a life, not a relationship.” (pg. 174)

“there is no formula to relationships. they have to be negotiated in loving ways, with room for both parties, what they want and what they need, what they can do and what their life is like…. love is when you are so concerned about someone else’s situation as you are about your own.” (pg. 178)

and my favorite quote of the whole book….

“devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning” (pg. 127)”

…love is…

September 8, 2009

My friend wrote this poem a long time ago but I just read it and fell in love with it. I’ve been reading Marianne Williamson alot lately and this totally encompasses the idea behind finding the love of God and using that love to love on others. Later on I’ll write more about Marianne when I have more time because although she has alot of new age thoughts, her writing is amazing and hits the spot and really opens up our eyes to finding the purpose of our life (which is to love), but for now enjoy ROSY’s poem:

What is that yearning within the heart, that ache that turns love from giving into a futile quest to get? What is that emptiness that you are seeking to fill?

It can be filled, of course, by giving yourself love, by opening yourself to the flow of endless love from the universe. But it can also be filled by allowing the love which fills your heart for others to be a great gift instead of a drama or the solution to a problem.

Love is. And if you are fortunate enough to love someone else, then allow that love to be a gift to you, a gift that fills you, whether or not the love you feel for another is returned in ways you wished it would be.

There is a great difference between the fulfillment of lustful or romantic fantasies and the reality that is love. Love is something quite different, but yet intertwined, and so it can be difficult to differentiate. But the romantic fantasy is focused on the future, not on what is right now, and ultimately leads to disappointment as the object of your fantasy is unable to create the world you had desired, a world in which you are coveted and admired, a world in which every deep desire of yours for love and attention is fulfilled. This is not a world of real relationships, once the potent mix of drugs which we call “falling in love” has worn off.

I wish to focus instead on another kind of love, a love which is very similar to that which you feel for a child or a very close friend for whom you wish nothing but the best and with whom you are not involved in a drama of getting.

For much of the drama in your life revolving around romantic love relationships is simply that: your frustrated desires to get something that you felt was lacking, something that you felt that this person promised you by way of the relationship.

What if you were to release this?
What if you were to allow the other person to be and not to have expectations that they would fulfill a need of yours?
What if you were to fulfill your own needs through your connection to spirit and through your actions in this physical world, and allow this other person to be someone who can live a parallel life, giving you both the great comfort of a partnership, yet a great deal of freedom as well, as interests or circumstances send you in other directions for a time?

And even if you love someone who does not appear to return your love, I wish you to look at it in different ways.

First, separate out your romantic fantasies and desire to have this person fulfill a role and a need in your life.
Without that, do you truly love?
Is this a person that you care to give love to without requiring any in return? For that is love, that is the love you extend to others from a full-to-overflowing heart.

The drama of your relationships is normally the result of trying to get from someone else what they cannot possibly give, which is to fulfill you, to make you whole.

This is your job and not the job of anyone else. That only comes when you get closer and closer to your Heavenly Father.

And if you seek this from another, if you give them a part of yourself and spend the rest of your relationship asking them to give back to you, you have made a poor bargain. And often it is a bargain that they did not willingly make, to take on the burden of a love with so many conditions.

When you give, give. When you love, love…just like Jesus did!!He is the perfect example to follow.
Realize that a heart full of love is a wondrous thing, especially when it is not tainted with jealousy and grasping neediness.

It is a wondrous thing, when you can truly care for another and want only the best for him or her, without requiring anything specific in return. This does not mean that you are suppressing your true feelings, manipulating behind the scenes, or crying your eyes out in private. All of that is a part of the drama of neediness and yearning.

Love fills your heart with gladness when the loved one is in your presence, and yet has the grace to let go after parting. Love such as this is something that you have not been taught, certainly not in the movies and magazines.

It is a lofty goal, to learn to love in this way, in a way in which you are giving, but yet also giving to yourself, for you realize that a heart full of love is a great gift to both of you. Silent and giving, full of golden energy that glows outward from a warm and pliable heart, this is love.

Embracing in its warmth, but not seeking more than it is, this is love. A spark in the eyes, a heart of gladness, a lilting voice of greeting, these are signs of a love without strings and attachments, a love without jealousy and neediness, a love which seeks to flow, not grasp.

This is a new way to love, and is something which may be difficult to achieve at first. But it is a goal worth pursuing, to learn to care for others in this way. And if the loved one moves on, that is all right. You are in a world full of people you may love.

For when you are truly giving love and not seeking to get anything specific in return, when you are glowing with love and not living a romantic fantasy, everyone is glad to receive your love.

Everyone is glad to be in the presence of your warm and glowing caring. And the glow which is returned to you is many times the energy which you pour forth in your flowing, selfless, generous love.

love never fails

joy and peace

September 5, 2009

Romans 15:13

May the God of Hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.